An Introduction

So I guess I have finally joined the blogging community.  This blog was originally supposed to bean  amusing look at my life- some of the stories are pure gold. I mean, who doesn't love my stories of the dog's enormous erection that needed emergency care, the neighbors with the Maypole, Vance and all the others.

But I haven't been really feeling all that fun lately. In 6 weeks I should have had a baby. Instead I had him 3 months ago and now he is dead. I suffered from severe pre-eclampsia and lost my little boy at 22 weeks 4 days gestational age. Life has kinda been at a standstill since that day. 4/29/09. He was our first born.

I have a huge chance of the pre-eclampsia showing up again. 60% chance. However there is an 80% chance I could get a living healthy baby out of a future pregnancy. Yeah, I know, the odds aren't that great compared to other women's, but they are all I have.

I suspect the following months, and possibly years, will focus on dealing with a future pregnancy and the overwhelming fear I am facing. I am not actively TTC - but not preventing either. Plus I have irregular cycles since giving birth - so that is a whole other story. I'm on vitamins, calcium supplements, 1 mg of folic acid and LDA to try and handle another pregnancy.

 I hope after a few months/years - the focus of my blog moves away from pre-eclampsia , because that will mean that my head won't still be stuck in the nightmare it is now. Happier days must be out there somewhere.