My Valentine

I was a happy child with family all around. I felt love. Love was all around me, when my mother held my hand in the morning or when my father would play with me. Love was sharing a bowl of Beef Stew with my grandfather just because it was my favorite while my grandmother listened to my day. I thought I knew what love was.

I thought I knew what love was when I was a teenager. Chasing boy after boy. I mean, love was the excitement and flutters your heart felt. The anticipation to see the boy again. The yearning to be loved in return.

I thought I knew what love was.... and then I met my husband and realized what I thought of love was really nowhere near the true extent of the emotion. Love wasn't just the flutters in your heart, love is the quiet sense of security in between those flutters.

With my husband, then I knew what love was... until I saw Vincent's little feet and felt overwhelmed and all encompassed by this fierce, intense love. A different love. Yet more powerful than anything I have ever felt. Love so strong I could cry tears of joy upon meeting my baby boy, even though he would never take a breath.

Then Lou came along. The love was as fierce as it was with Vincent, only this time I got to take Lou home with me. Everytime he flashes his killer smile at me - I melt. I am amazed at the way he is able to fill my heart with such joy, at times I feel I am about to burst.

Now at this stage in my life I can say I know what love is... love is dynamic. It changes all the time. There is no comparing love. No measure will justify a mothers love for her child vs her love for her husband. One thing I have noticed, since Vincent I feel I can love more fully. My parents, my brothers, my husband and my friends... and of course my little boy. I love more fully because I know it is all we have. At the end of the day we love and are loved. Even in shitty times, broke and fighting with the husband with the baby throwing up, I feel so overwhelmed with love.

So while my life may be far from perfect, I am blessed. One year ago, I was in my hospital room eating dinner with the hubby and watching my cheesy favorite movie - Fools Rush In. We were antsy for the safe arrival of our wonderful boy.

This year he was my Valentine - and I can definitely say I know what love is....

(me and my Valentine)

(he has another adorable first V-Day card from his grandparents - but we hung it up in his room and I am NOT going in there!!! He is sleeping!!!)

(mommy's special Valentine's Dinner for her boy-Broccoli Patty (pureed broccoli crowns, mixed with oatmeal to slightly thicken and rolled in panko bread crumbs - then toasted to perfection!) and a Healthy Parfait (yobaby Vanilla yogurt (ummm - this is the first time he has had this flavor - it tastes just like pudding!!! Very good for desserts) with sliced strawberries and blueberries).

(he LOVED it!!!!)

(thank you Mommy - all full now!)

(flowers from my boy ... according to his dad they were from the boy at least)

(awww - mommy :D )

(my new blanket to cuddle with the boy in (from the boy of course!) and his stuffed animals - Devil Teddy from Mommy and Daddy and Doggie from Nana and Grampy)

(I have been good and am patiently waiting to open this gift from the hubby - we never celebrate Valentine's Day - so I am eager to see what's inside!!!)